why we're back (poem)

for Chia Tao

old ones, we all find ourselves
back here when we were certainly on the verge

of being cloud-dragons. so male, so
stubborn in our meditations, unlike trees

even the animals we mimicked felt
their way through life not putting

blades through their chests for shame
of nurturing another warm living thing

someone you love, dies and you
berate yourself for feeling sad